Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
I'm both gender and math confused
YOU ATE THE FUCKING GOLDFISH!?
just woke up to an abnormally swollen ankle (broken, perhaps?) and a shirtless man with the most beautiful abs I've ever seen sleeping on my floor.
is your ankle ok??
WHY IS HE ON THE FLOOR. SINCE WHEN DOES BLACKOUT ME ALSO COCKBLOCK ME
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