She ordered a salad and a budweiser. I love her.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
He had a ladies night special at his place. Unlimited jello shots till 10, 50 cents after.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
i don't care if its just a preseason game, my pick up a guy and suck him off in the bathroom skills are in midseason form
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Why can't I come over and snuggle you and make you lick my boots
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Welp, no use in crying over spilt milk. I can't unbang her.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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