you want to go make fun of the strippers on try out night
i got kicked out last time for laughing
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
when she asked me if it was possible to swim under north america i knew it was time to leave.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You gave me your shirt to use as a napkin every time I spilled beer on myself. Before we went to the bar.
do you ever feel so high you're swimming backstroke and then you realize you're still laying in bed on tumblr
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I wish I could be the kind of drunk Bobbi is... She stumbles around outside at 4am with a broken high heel and babbling about rainbows and getting dick...
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
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