hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
if you ever come into my room screaming for me to set up rockband at 4:45 am ever again i will kill you
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
Suspicion confirmed. my mom has her nipples pierced
Way to crack the case Nancy Drew
Idk she didn't seem that weird to me but I had just eaten an entire tray of jello infused with liquor so I could be wrong...
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
Which emoticons convey sympathy for sleeping with someones bf ??
I would like you to know, a bag of cheese cubes just attacked me at work.
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
Two words: nipple clamps
Randomize
