Oh no, it isn't official until she poops.
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
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