we just got in the car and birthday sex is playing
that is a sign the 3 of us should have a threesome
we agree. completely
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
Im celebrating the fact that the one guy who has ever denied me has just come out of the closet
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
I'm voting my liver organ of the month. The award ceremony is next weekend.
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
Someone drank my pedialite!
YOU drank your pedialite. I watched you chase shots with it!
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
Randomize