is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
He just kept yelling woof and then threw money all over me...
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
Someday you'll be stoned enough to create a one-person step team and then you'll understand
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
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