Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
White Russians with skim milk. Fuck I'm healthy.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
I Never golf you the sypdu of andrew. The one o will marry. The one j plwgded my last breath up. The one I pledged everything I live forbworh to. I love him more than life itself
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
Where are you, who is in my bed, why is he wearing a spandex onesie as underwear, how did i get teethmarks on my forehead, what are we doing tonight?
Someone left their drag queen on my couch. On the plus side, he sure does know how to make a mean cup of coffee.
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
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