We may or may not have a drunk cat on our hands.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
battery dying...get laid and text me after...or during...its whatever.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
On a side note I think I burnt my eyebrow when we "teter-totered" into the fire
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm chatting on my fake OkCupid account and watching Lion Witch & Wardrobe on my second screen. Hail me, King of the Creepers
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I was at a hookups house and peed in his sink so I wouldn't wake up his mom... drunk me is on a different level
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
