The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
Her body is shaped like a coke bottle...a two liter coke bottle
too bad you live with your parents still
dude, your ex-bf is on match.com
details on that.
well, his profile doesn't say anything about herpes.
he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
he sent me a winky sad face. i cannot deal this level of pathetically needy flirtatiousness.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
At some point last night was I riding a garbage can.. Things are starting to come back to me
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
Iron Man just asked me back to his place... Not sure I can handle this. Wish me luck.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
ALSO I MAYBE ACCIDENTALLY HAND CUFFED MYSELF TO A CHAIR