Why are handjobs necessary in class?
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
19 Characteristics That Make People Instantly Attractive
in my drunkeness I still was able to plan for the morning. I duck taped my keys, a water bottle full of mimosa and my cell phone to the front door.
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
My vibrator challenges you to a duel.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
WHY DID YOU INVITE ALEX?!?
Because she offered to bring a keg.
And also because you fucked her in an alley last week and I'm trying to be a good friend.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...