my boyfriend just named your boyfriend's penis.
Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
23 Adults Confess The Irrational Fears They Had When They Were Kids
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
lit a joint with my parents wedding matches today, this is what happens when you're out of lighter fluid. didnt even feel guilty.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
They took my balls.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
These 25 Women First Experienced Sexual Harassment At A Shocking Age
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
i need some fresh meat. meat that has a license and a job and isn’t a FULL-blown alcoholic. partial i could tolerate, bc, haha, let’s be honest, me likey my drinkies.