What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
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sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
I sent her 8 pictures of my dick in a baked potato. Not sure how I thought that would get me laid later.
Omg having my Grindr go off at the planned parenthood is just not okay
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
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The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
I mean honestly, I love naps like Anthony Weiner loves sending dick pics
There's a guy in a life size dick costume, and two guys with white shirts that are each half if a pair of breasts in a red bra lol. They came separate but when they saw each other there was some titty fucking in the street, it's only 11
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.