She highfived me after i yelled "I'm the clit-commander!" when i came. kevin smith fan and clearly a keeper
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
So apparently I ran down the hall to another party and started handing out uncooked spaghetti to strangers. You'd be surprised how many drunk people will eat raw noodles.
I'm not gonna lie. The thing I miss the most about him right now is the air conditioned hotel rooms.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
Can't decide if this guy is hot or if I'm just bored.
Sex is clearly the solution either way.
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I CAN ONLY BE THE BIRDIE ON YOUR SHOULDER WHO LEADS YOU INTO BAD DESCISIONS
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
we're so committed to being not committed
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
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