He can hate all he wants but were fucking with these crocs on
Oh my god it just tripped me out that I used to be a baby, I had to tell you.
Slurping strawberries throug a straw. It feels like the kool-aid man is coming in my mouth.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It's the first day of summer. It's not a race it's a marathon. Pace yourself
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
He was spooning with the dog when I came home. Now shes afriad to go near him. Should I ask?
Is it bad that I feel proud to be the first one to puke in the apartment? And I did it in style?
You straight up painted the counter with steak, tequila and beer. You owe me a knew toothbrush.
Besides he said his dick was as big as a loaf of bread and that it was broken. So I was like u have half a head of hair and a broken dick that looks like bread. No thanks. Im good.
Are you still free tonight?
Oh shit I kinda forgot and took acid
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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