they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
so my phone accidentally called my dad from my purse at 2:14am....he has a 5 min voicemail of me discussing how Alicia should bang the guy who eats good pussy... i can never look at my dad in the face again....
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
He said "you speak American pretty good for a Canadian" and it took everything in me to still fuck him. Dry spell ended btw
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
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