I would fuck her until my dick fell off. then i would fuck her with your dick.
It was my first time buying condoms at the liquor store... I was nervous and there were quite a few people, so I tried to do it as quickly and quietly as possible. When I got to the Indian cashier, he took one look at them and said loudly, "Ohhh you gonna get it on tonight, ah?!"
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
i think you lost all your innocence when you were caught straddling a fence in your thong & cowboy boots by the 40 year old apartment manager
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
