Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
You stole a frozen pizza from the freezer, stuffed it in the back of your shirt then proceeded to leave the party.
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
was it me or did you scream 'champagne motherfucker' when you punched him in the face ??
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
