All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
Apparently I whispered "Jesus was here" and bailed out of the moving taxi.
Fake an illness. Her and her friends are like the female version of guys who wear tapout shirts
I don't think tequila will soothe the spots where my tonsils used to be.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I swear to go if the response she sends me something along the lines of who the fuck is Mark Hamill I might need to brake up with her.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
Give me a few. Gonna ride the rollercoaster.
Last night I had a dream that a man with an ice cream body entered a bicycle throwing contest and won.
Randomize
