Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I was actually high enough at that point that I was just casually following your glowing footsteps like in Avatar while we ran from the cops.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I get a nose bleed and my uncle is automatically giving me the "your doing lines off dashboards again aren't you" look
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
Do him. As soon as possible and as often as possible. That's what Oprah would say
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I got home and he was wearing a suit. He said he reason was because it was shirt and tie Saturday and that he won't change until midnight. He then proceeded to answer the door in a British accent.
Can we just take a minute to acknowledge that you're drinking with your gay ex boyfriend's DAD who is a DEACON??
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
Randomize
