pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
Randomize
