We're facebook friends in real life
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
What happens at the gay bar stays at the gay bar. Except that I sold my panties for $100. People should know that.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
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