Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just saw a dude in a banana costume get beat down by a one shoed black dude wearing a kilt...paninis is such a shit show after 10 on a Saturday
im eating mac and cheese with a makeup brush. there is wayyyyy too much wrong with this night.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
We played alot of beer pong and ventured into the woods with tiki torches
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
Just got back from a Walmart run. The music went straight from Kid Rock to John Phillip Souza. If that doesn't scream 'MURICA I don't know what will. Happy 4th!
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
