Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
Randomize
