do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
I'm proud of our boobs and what they could potentially achieve in life.
Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I don't have to hold her hair back as she blows me but I do have to hold the ball on the Santa hat
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We're over by the bouncy castles. I'm the one wearing a baby. Bring Twizzlers.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
He was going down on me and all I could think about was how proud of me you'd be
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