Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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