Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
stop texting me from phones in the verizon store and pretending to be guys i talked to when i was drunk. its confusing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
You kept saying "sir officer" which would have been polite and helped you if it wasn't a female. She was pissed.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
I just walked away from a youth soccer tournament popping every birth control pill I had left in the pack.
I did it again.
I drunk texted John McCain.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize