just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
What happened at the top of the stairs is never to be spoken of again.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Well, now that you have a gf, its gonna be awkward when I get drunk and make out with you..... Then later, pretend like I don't remember.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
His family, without saying anything, started a game of quarters the moment the drinks arrived. I love them. If only I didn't hate him so much.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
Randomize
