My fucking roommate unpluged my alarm; I pissed on his clean clothes.
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
I have no idea. After the fireworks it all went to shit. Do you know why I woke up with a road sign?
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Just gave my liver a good luck and I'm sorry speech
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
If I die tonight somebody's going to have to let all my tinder matches know.
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
My toothbrush tastes like captain morgan
I'm jealous
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