I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Babe. You eat pussy like a god warrior sent from a galaxy far far away to destroy female genitalia with new realms of pleasure. That's how I know your not gay.
Anderson Cooper just came out.
Crying tears of glitter and rainbows right now. Gonna decorate my dildo like My Little Pony in his honor.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
I'd say tonight was pretty successful. I rode an iron horse naked and sweet talked myself out of an MIC while wearing a bra filled with four loko.
There is a BIG difference between doing coke and getting peed on and getting peed on FOR coke
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
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