Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
The good news is the bleeding stopped. I think I'm going to sober up before I tell you the bad news though.
All that matters is I got the megaphone home safely
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Had to go see my sisters new baby this morn in the clothes I wore to the rave last night. Still drunk. Almost dropped it. I'll be a good aunt right?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
