It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I will no longer accept nudes from you because I met your boyfriend last night and he seems like a nice guy
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
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