super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
We had sex in the bathroom. Then he told me I could watch him pee.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
Due to certain anatomical proportions it was less like fucking and more like childbirth.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
yea plus he's gonna be wearing his gumby costume so that'll take a lot of pressure off too
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
I was just giving a mobile app demo to a client, on my iPhone, when a reminder alert appeared across the page blinking "12pm: go home and give John head". You're an asshole
Hahaha oops.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Randomize
