Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
He was probably pissed, but i couldn't tell for sure. How pissed can someone really look while holding a fishbowl mimosa?
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
Hypothetically going to the gym on coke was a good idea
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
Good. Go forth, young stallion. Destroy the vaginal region with your tidy crotch.
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I kept falling all over the place and yelled at the bouncer you can't kick me out I'm from Texas.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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