he wasnt into me til he saw how good i was at ms pacman. wtf why does this always happen? when she kisses pacman it was a little awkward, so i made my move. i went for more than one kind of banana last night!
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
only i would get cock blocked by a cop
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
