The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
How does everyone that never saw me naked know I'm built like a smurf?
READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
People in love make me want to vomit
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
just woke up to overhearing her on the phone saying "yeah we fucked last night, that makes 42." should i get tested?
well i fucked her too, so yes.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
I keep calling his kid the wring name. This is not helping my cause. And by cause mean his dick
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
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