I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
There's nothing like puking in the airport on the way TO Vegas. Something tells me i pregamed a little too hard.
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I feel like college is just an experience in what names I can't name my future son.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
just found a someones bra in what seems to be a mix of pickle juice and vodka in my fridge. Who was over here lately?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
That's the best thing about having gay dads, you don't gotta do shit on mothers da and everybody is down wit getting wasted on mimosas at brunch
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
If the fate of the world hinged on some chubby girl getting laid, the president would dispatch me with a fifth of Jameson immediately and then rest easy.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
Randomize
