Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
In hindsight, the torn ligament in my knee is probably the fault of the ginbucket and jager bombs starting at 3pm. I guess I'll stop blaming it on you.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
These 25 People Forgave their Significant Others for Saying Stupid Things
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We just broke into a lion king sing along. Understanding is not possible.
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
Randomize
