Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
It's 8:30am and I'm drinking.... this is a new low
I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Even after projectile vomiting watermelon on the beach, it still sounds appetizing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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