I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I feel like I'm back in highscool trying to hide my erections at work
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
they call him Oral-B. enough said
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm convinced that the Christmas lights in my room contributed to the great sex.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Last night you said you were going to stop drinking and then proceeded to dip cookies in your vodka.
Sadly that explains a lot.
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