My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
20 yrs from now I just want to barge in her house and yell at her kids, "I took ur moms virginity!"
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
I have your shoes, your bike, and someones blue underwear. Round 2 tonight?
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
She kept grabbing my head and told my faces to stop shaking.. Also, she kept whispering something about seeing flowers in my eyes.
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
So um... You probably shouldn't post that picture of me and your crotch just because that's a new level of raunchiness that I'm not willing to accept yet
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