I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
Whiskey dick is like insurance for making bad decisions
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
My bar tender texts me around 5ish and ask what I feel like, so it's ready for me when I get home. All star service.
Dude. You are the LAST person that should live above a bar.
I'm so jealous of your sex life. You know it's awesome when thinking about the sex you had last night brings you tears of joy.
Tbh I would eat a grilled cheese off your dick.
At the light, his mom pulled up next to us while I was giving him road head. He forgot to tell me she was meeting us at the movie. So long story short, I convinced her I drove myself, pick me up in 20.
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Randomize
