Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
She's relieving herself in the laundry room. I'm really hoping there's a toilet in there...
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Everybody posting sickening holiday couple pics and I'm over here deepthroating a bottle of whiskey.
He's driving 2 hours to visit me and he's bringing weed. I love him so much.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
