i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
i think i just encouraged him to glue googly eyes to my boobs
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
Eh, it could have been worse. I may or may not have been wearing a jedi cloak while getting my dick sucked.
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