you used to get mad at me for mentioning 'unprotected sex' and happenings in my bed
well yeah, but then i realized the wisdom of your ways.
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
I have a drinking game planned. Were gunna watch empire records. Everytime they say rex manning we have to take a shot
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
There may or may not be an ass shaped dent in the hood of my car. All I know is windshield wipers aren't as sturdy as you think to hold onto.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
Dont care about too tired for sex, thank you for leaving your laser pointer. I have now determined both my cats are stupid.
Randomize
