As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
You know you're on day 1 of your period when the new mcdonalds commercial makes you cry
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
We left his house because I forgot how to drink water, I was just holding it in my mouth and then spitting it out, needless to say I don't remember the sex.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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