I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
Half Baked? Au contraire, Ben and Jerry, I was fully baked when I ate that whole pint of ice cream.
this just has baby written all over it
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
