Let's start a violent farting gang. We can do walkbys.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
My mom just blew pot smoke into my nose and called me a cat.
Also pregame at mine tomorrow?
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
He snapchated me a photo of his penis with the caption "it needs a home".
Thank you for trusting your ovaries to me
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
I wanted to give everyone gifts as they left the house... So when your wondering where most of the christmas ornaments are I'm really sorry.
I’m also apparently a very socialist drunk now
Instead of a horny one. All I want to fuck is capitalism these days.
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