After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm calling into work with a wicked case of sledge hammer crotch. She has to understand
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just found a red feather stuck to my penis and i really wanted to send you a picture but too much
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
You'd be proud. Took my birth control today at 12:30 with a Budweiser. Guy across the bar saw and held his bottle up to salute me 😂
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize