So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
bro im too drunk for your spanish code words. did you fuck her or not.
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
My vagina is officially offended.
I feel like I got run over by a steamroller made of cigarettes and booze driven by all of the men I've slept with.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
