I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
I just opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a tube of mascara. Get on my level
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
My girlfriend is studying for the MCAT by watching The Magic Schoolbus. There go my dreams of being a househusband.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
last night is slowly putting itself back together. Its one giant slutty puzzle, all the pieces are covered in tequila and shame.
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
i feel like the girl with kaleidoscope eyes except the kaleidoscopes are sparkly butt plugs
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